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You might have heard of the Osu caste system in Igbo land. In case you haven't, this is a system of ostracization of certain people who have been judged to have committed an abominable act. It discourages social interaction, and even marriage with these people. So how does a person become an Osu? As stated earlier, these people have been judged and found guilty to have committed a terrible offence. In the past, the Igbo people lived their lives according to the Odinani (the laws of the earth). These laws were created by the earth goddess Ala, for the people to live by. Anyone who commits an atrocity against these laws, risks ostracization; thereby becoming an Osu. An Osu could be sold to slavery, or become properties of deities. Either way, social interaction is severed with these people. They are seen as inferior humans, unworthy to associate with the Nwadiala. They are seen as unclean and are even not allowed to break kola; which as you may know is very important in the Igbo culture. They are also made to live in shrines and market places, away from others. And should they bear children, those children automatically become Osu. It can become a generational thing. Modern times, have brought with it the criticism of this system. It has been considered as a violation of human rights, with some of the punishment associated with it labelled as inhumane. Human rights groups were known to have been really vocal about it, calling for its abolishment. According to history, the osu caste system has been abolished. This was on the 28th of December 2018, in a ceremony conducted in Nri. However, the question here is - how effective has this abolishment been? Till this day, families are hesitant to let their children marry a person who was born into a family identified as osu. Some outrightly forbid such union, believing it is a marriage which would be plagued with series of unfortunate events. It is one of the several 'findings' done by most families, during the introduction phase of a proposed marriage. Isn't it strange that even with the advent of Christianity and evolution, there are certain people who are still rooted in ancient practices? It goes to show that, tradition still has some sort of hold on us, even if we choose not to admit it.

In History and Culture • 2 min read • Oct 25, 2022 10:17a.m.

THE OSU CASTE SYSTEM

THE OSU CASTE SYSTEM

Jefferson Nnadiekwe

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Hi, it's Jefferson, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a creative screenwriter, photographer, cinematographer and creative director. You can check out some of my works here https://instagram.com/themi...

Jefferson Nnadiekwe

Freelance scriptwriter and creative photographer

Lagos, Nigeria

There is an unappreciated wisdom and concern that comes with the advice 'do not post everything on social media'. Often, when that statement is made, it is met with a measure of resistance (as is almost everything these days). People assume that whoever made it has a nefarious intention of trying to stop people from living their lives and enjoying moments. Seriously what's with the growing trend of arguing rather than hearing out? Anyway, whether we like it or not, there is an absolute truth behind the phrase. Last week can be termed a week of weddings - from the much anticipated and divisive union between Nigerian musician; Davido, and his long term partner; Chioma, to the marriage between actress; Sharon Ooja and her billionaire boo. There was plenty to make helpless romantics swoon all over social media. But as always with things like these, where there are well wishers, there are the 'haters' - and boy where there a truck load of them. It was quite discomforting to see people attempt to tear down both weddings with predictions, investigations, and allegations which some were admittedly intriguing. I wouldn't want to go into details of some of the things said, however I assume no newly wed would want to sojourn into a life long commitment having seeds of doubt planted in their heads. Imagine having strangers stake on the longevity of your marriage the very first day it starts. It's not their fault we might think. Of course, they didn't commit any crime by wanting to share their happiness on social media. Yet, the other side of the coin permits that what is shared on public space becomes the public's concern. And everyone on that space can analyze and infer whatever they want in the capacity at which they are able to reason. It's unfair I know, but it's not a crime - and frankly you cannot demand that people mind their business and stay out of your affairs when you brought your affairs to them in the first place. So what do we do? Simple, try as much as we can not to feed the trolls. Do not give room for your joy to be contaminated with negativity. The urge to share stuff on social media has to be curtailed whether we like it or not. Private and intimate moments should be just that - ain't anyone ever died from not posting their wins online. I hear someone counter that these wins are shared to document and preserve the memory. Need I remind you that fond memories have always been preserved by individuals decades before the advent of Instagram or Facebook or X. Family videos on VHS tapes, photo books, journals and diaries - all of which their contents are exclusive to the creators barring the decision to share with a few genuine friends and well wishers. The uncomfortable truth is that we share so much these days on social media to prove that there is something good happening in our lives (keyword: Prove). We want people to see that this good thing is happening to us or we are at a good place. Why else is there a compulsive need to share a private date with a partner with the rest of the world? Or that promotion at work? Some of these things we do as subtle brags and flexes. Don't come for me for judging anyone, because even I do it too (I just try not to be excessive). We share so much while we refuse to acknowledge the bad side. We live in an apathetic world, and current economic hardship has made a lot of people frustrated and unhappy. These people in turn seek to spread their misfortune wherever they can. The perception that someone is happier than they are triggers them to corrupt that happiness. It's not ideal but it's reality. Having known this, it is unarguably wise to protect yourself and family from the infectious by limiting the content we share online. The trolls are always lurking, meaning that our loved ones should be protected from them as best as we can - especially those ones who are not big on social media in the first place. But I cannot tell grown ups what to post or not can I? It's just that the same repeated complaints about trolls on social media is becoming tiring. No matter how loud we scream it, everyone is not going to respectfully receive our posts online. But I guess at the end of the day, the choice lies in the hands of each person.

In Literature, Writing and Blogging • 4 min read • Jul 02, 2024 15:49p.m.

NOSY NETIZENS

NOSY NETIZENS

Jefferson Nnadiekwe

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I am pretty sure the OGs will remember this popular lyric from 9ice. I guess it is obvious that the Nigerian music entertainment sector has always had a thing for the Grammys. Being a foreign recording academy award, it is very recognised as a global recognition of an artistes work. So, you can only imagine the excitement and rave when people found out that Laycon has become a part of the Grammys voting committee, literally announced via their official Twitter account. Yup, that's right 😆One cannot help but remember this BBN housemate, gathering fan love from viewers of the show, who came into the game a newbie, trying to just promote his music. You see the steady growth in his path and right from the jump, he was always about his music.From raking in millions in 2020, winning the BBNaija show and pursuing his music pact willfully, to performing for the Grammy Recording Academy and sitting at the "Big Boys" table of committee. I think it is obvious they were very pleased with his performance of his hit song, "All over me".There is no reason to downplay or be modest about this, it is quite a big deal. I mean, this is where most artistes try to be for years and he got it 2yrs after the house  A star in the Big Brother Naija house and a bigger star outside the house. Leave it to the Hiphop head to make it fun by saying, "My price just went up". You cannot even be mad about this, it's Laycon! 😎

Hi, it's Jefferson, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a creative screenwriter, photographer, cinematographer and creative director. You can check out some of my works here https://instagram.com/themi...

Bryan Emejor Content Creator @ TwoCents

Ughelli, Nigeria

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In Music and Entertainment • 2 min read • Oct 20, 2022 16:13p.m.

No doubt me, I go bring you Grammy

No doubt me, I go bring you Grammy

Bryan Emejor

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I've always been of the opinion that the 2023 general elections is gonna be the most interesting we've had yet and there's already evidence to prove this. Nigeria prides itself as being the most populous black nation on the surface of the earth with a population of over 200 million, approximately half being Muslim and the other half, Christian and the remaining few, practising other religions. It goes without gainsaying that religion is going to be a huge factor when decisions on issues of national importance are made. As a result, a quota system was adopted in almost every area of national life to keep things fair between the Muslim dominated North and the Christian dominated South and the presidency is not left out. There's this widely known gentleman's agreement not to have same religion in the presidency at once. When there's a Muslim president, there must be a Christian Vice President and vice versa. Also if there's a Muslim president, it is expected that the next president should be a Christian. The current President, Buhari, whose tenure ends next year, 2023 is from the Muslim North and it is expected that the next president should be a Christian from the South based on the gentleman's agreement otherwise called zoning. Knowing this, I'd have expected that parties should have accepted only Southerners or Christians as contestants in their primaries election as President Buhari is about completing his second term in office and it is expected that power should shift to the South. Rather, it was free for all and in an unexpected twist, Atiku Abubakar, a Northern Muslim clinched the ticket for the PDP, the major opposition party and Bola Tinubu, also a Muslim but from the South clinched the ticket for the APC. The only candidate who meets the requirement of Southern Christian is Peter Obi of the Labour Party but his candidacy seems like the proverbial long walk to freedom as he is the third force, after the APC and PDP and believed not to have the political structure required to win the presidency. This has all been interesting to witness and live through but the next interesting event will be how the candidates will pick their running mates and who they'll be picking. Who do you think they'll pick as running mates and how do you think it will affect their candidacies?

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Jefferson Nnadiekwe

Freelance scriptwriter and creative photographer

Lagos, Nigeria

Quite often, we see post from contacts on our social media, about fake friends. Friends who do not reciprocate the energy or affection given to them. Some of us do not vent on social media, but we rather have it on our minds. And I am not going to lie, I once was guilty of this. However I got thinking, are these fake friends guilty of not reciprocating energy, or is it that they do not give as much as we want? The truth is some people are more expressive with their emotions than others. So if Mr A is more expressive than his friend, Mr B, does that make Mr B a fake friend. I would like to share an experience with a friend. Sometime, while I was ill; this friend made it a duty to call multiple times each day, to check up on me. A gesture I very much appreciated. Weeks later, she fell ill. I did same - called to check up on her, but not multiple times each day (morning and evening). However, she was offended by the fact that I did not call as much as she did. And I was branded with the fake friend tag. The experience got me thinking - maybe I wasn't being a good friend. But then again, I expressed concern about the state of her health. Just not as much as she'd have expected. Sometimes I still ask myself if I did a wrong thing. Sometimes, the people we brand as fake, are doing the much they can. But our expectations, blind us to see that. A lot of people have cut ties with valuable people in their lives because of expectations. I believe friendship should be measured by the impact a person has on another's life. And not based on some baseless record of reciprocity.

In People and Society • 2 min read • Sep 23, 2022 15:43p.m.

LET'S TALK ABOUT FAKE FRIENDS

LET'S TALK ABOUT FAKE FRIENDS

Jefferson Nnadiekwe

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We all know how bad news sells better than good news does and it makes me wonder what goes on in people’s minds to make them more excited about hearing, sharing and discussing bad news rather than good news. This then begs the question: Are we all evil or are we just all products of our past trauma and it’s just a trauma response? I know that everyone is struggling with something and I like to think that means we all share that experience of going through hard times; you would think that we would be more understanding, willing to help and accepting of people when they fall or fail or just aren’t in the right space but it’s quite the contrary: a lot of people criticise and celebrate people’s tough times… I sit here wondering how we expect the world to get better if we don’t even like/love ourselves… We don’t have any other specie coming to save us, we are all we have and we have to learn to heal, not just personally but globally… I have chosen to be a part of the healing of the hearts in the world, I hope you will too… LET US SHARE AND BE EXCITED ABOUT GOOD NEWS! What do you reckon?

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Hi, it's Jefferson, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a creative screenwriter, photographer, cinematographer and creative director. You can check out some of my works here https://instagram.com/themi...

Toluwanimi Jewel A Doctor @ Hospital in Melbourne

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In Mental Health • 1 min read • Jan 15, 2023 00:33a.m.

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Tomi Walker

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Samuel Ibok

Marketing Supervisor @ Crusader Sterling Pensions Limited

Lagos, Nigeria

They say the apple does not fall far from the tree, but I was the exception, or I was supposed to be. I grew up hating my parents, who died when I was only 4. They were known by many to be ruthless and fierce. They tried to shield me from that, but I guess I wasn't too young to see the patterns. When they passed, my grandparents took me in and kept me far from my parents' legacy. I hawked and hustled hard, like every kid who grew up on the rough streets of Lagos. I graduated with good grades, despite my side hustles. I became famous in my area because I was considered a smart kid. I remember how my neighbours used to call me genius, and even the strong men in my area tagged me Sabi Pikin, and I wasn't to be harmed by any rival group. I landed a job at a marketing firm, and I was certain I would make magic. A few months into the job, I received four offers from three top-tier universities in the UK to study my dream course. I was overwhelmed, and for the first time in my life, I felt like things started to fall into place.  I had planned to resign at the end of a particular project at work so I could focus on doubling my hustle and raising funds to pay my deposit and secure my admission. I resumed work the week before my notice period ended and heard that some company items were missing. Now I wasn't very worried because I thought I wouldn't be questioned because I wasn't in charge of the items, but I was in that department. The following day, some policemen showed up at work and started questioning people. Normally me and Olopa no get business but I had to just respond to questions to fulfil all righteousness. Before I knew it, I was told that I would be taken to the station for further questioning. I dragged out the issue, stating boldly that I am innocent. I told my boss that I could not go to the station because of my Japa plans, but he bluntly told me that I was a key suspect. He said that it's possible that I sold the items to fund my visa application; besides, the son of a thief is also a thief.  He basically made me the chief suspect over an issue I had no idea about.  The police made things worse by using my parents' legacy to taunt me. My old grandparents pleaded on my behalf, but to no avail. The streets heard of my plight and raised money to bail me out, but I was thrown into prison without being found guilty of any crime. I wept for days, and my entire life flashed before me. The deadline for my deposit payment had passed, and I had given up on my plans. Three days before my release, I met an old colleague of my dad who told me about my dad and the reason he became the man he was before he died. My dad was betrayed by the government and used as a scapegoat. He resorted to violence as a means of survival. I vowed that day to cause pain to all those who stole my future from me. I was baptised fully with the street OT, and I guess my destiny changed. I became omó èsan- the son of vengeance. When I went home, everyone who saw me knew I had changed. The strong men in my hood stepped back and said I had finally embraced my destiny. My grandparents wept for me because I became the very thing they spent their remaining year protecting me from.  I went to my former boss's favourite chilling spot and gave him a surprise smile! He couldn't even recognise me. I was buff, and my hoody kept me a mystery. I called him "Final Boss," a name no one else but me called him at work. He was shocked to see me in the flesh. The scars on my face must have scared him, but that was only the beginning. He stood there looking at me in fear, and I reminded him of the time he stole from me. He called me Ayo and tried to apologize, but it was too late. I had already embraced my destiny. He didn't bother to release me even when they had found the actual thief. I told him today wasn't his day, but I would take from him more than he took from me. I looked him in the eye and told him I am Ésan, the son of vengeance. I walked away knowing that he would lose his sleep and fellowship with his worries. That made me happy because he would have a taste of what prison felt like. I noticed he had upgraded his security detail, and word got out that he was going to leave the country with his family for security reasons. He handed over his company to his younger brother to run. He who knows the street will not run aimlessly. I waited patiently for him to think he would finally be free. His flight was at 8 p.m., and I knew fear would make him lodge close to the airport. I followed him to the hotel and planted one of my ladies there. They say something must kill a man, right? Well, his Akilis Hill was a fair, curvy woman. He tried his luck with the lady, and she played along. He sent his guard to pay for another room, and that was our opportunity. We snatched him, drugged him, and placed him in a wheel chair. We rolled him out carefully and took him to where his story would end. He woke up tied up and in shock. He screamed for help, and he kept weeping. I told him that the sins of the father would be met by the son and that my vengeance would fall on his entire family. He kept begging for mercy—the very thing he didn't give me. I leaked the news of his kidnapping to Tunde Ednut, and it was trending on Twitter. My guys started a live video on Twitter, and I made him confess to the entire world. I asked the viewers to judge him based on a poll, and the majority asked for his death. But I knew that constant fear was worse than death.  Over 4 million people had joined the live video, and the hashtag "ésan" was trending. I did the unexpected. I dropped his location on the live feed and walked away with my crew. The authorities arrived on the scene after we had left. The location was flooded with an angry mob that connected my boss to their problems. My story became a source of strength for other young people, and in a matter of weeks, the entire nation was in chaos. People took to the streets to demand their rights and the removal of corrupt officials. Strong men assembled under one umbrella with the goal of fighting the oppressors. The international community predicted an impending collapse in my nation because of the state of affairs. Many built statues for me and wrote songs about me. Those in the other camp felt my methods were too extreme and unlawful.  The government is still looking for me, and they think I am on the run. They have no idea that I am no longer a person but an idea, a force, and a philosophy.  I am my father's son, Ésan—the son of vengeance. To be continued......

In Literature, Writing and Blogging • 5 min read • Apr 23, 2023 22:20p.m.

OMÓ ÉSAN

OMÓ ÉSAN

Samuel Ibok

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Cyrus Majebi

Queensley Okon

Esther Omemu

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What is propaganda? It is information, especially of a biased or misleading nature, used to promote a political cause or point of view. The term “propaganda” apparently first came into common use in Europe as a result of the missionary activities of the Catholic church. In 1622 Pope Gregory XV created in Rome the Congregation for spreading the faith and regulating church affairs in heathen lands. (Lifted from American Historical Association) So, while the term may have been created for action with a moral justification and cause, we have seen it morph over the years to mean something else. There is no better time to discuss this than election season. With the birth of the internet, the gatekeepers and the old guards who restricted those who were not trained from airing their views were bypassed. There is not as much institutional control over information, this brought about a boom of growth because it gave easy access to information to those who needed it, no matter where in the world they were. We also learned an important lesson, every good thing, no matter how noble has its dark side, and this was EVERYONE had access to air their views. What makes propaganda a real danger and threat is the fact that it looks like the truth and real information at the surface level. They put out actual footage; video, pictures, etc. So you think to yourself, if the picture or video is there then it's real. The said facts or evidence are in reality altered or warped to fit the narrative the publisher wants. So while two people get the same general information, the understanding of events is like Night and Day, completely different. In summary, you do not realize you are being played or manipulated. While I'm a believer in freedom of speech, and expressing opinions, I know enough to know that freedom can only truly exist if there are laws, and rules guiding it, and consideration for your fellow man and his experience. This is the paradox of life, without restrictions, your freedom will impede on the freedom of another, ultimately resulting in misunderstanding and chaos. This is what in some ways began to happen more frequently with the news. The point of this post is to help make you aware of when you are being fed propaganda, at least to some extent. 1. Slow down: The internet is a place where content and information hits us per second; especially if you have a great internet connection. The idea of social media is to flood the user with so much content that they do not have a second to get bored, because if they do, they leave. This is because each second you are on, engaging, increases the chances of you clicking on/ viewing paid ads or patronizing the business of someone else on the platform, which convinces them that the platform is a great place to do business, so they are most likely more convinced to click the ad button to boost publicity, aiding the loop that is the cycle. This has a way of sucking us in, so much so that we react to things without thinking, completely on instinct. Have you caught yourself about to type something, then you go 'Nah, it's not worth it?’ The same thing happens when we see propaganda, we react without pausing to ask ourselves questions, "is it real, true, or why?" Asking why someone would do something is a good place to start, as it reveals the motives and what they stand to gain, which reveals more information the more you ask "why?" 2. Check the source: I know it can be exciting to see certain headlines, this is generally because they do that for a living and have mastered keywords and phrases they know trigger people, but when you read that caption or that short clip edited, make sure to check; is the site a trustworthy one? A gossip blog or page with a track record for factual news and not one that is more likely to post content to get you riled up just for profit. 3. Google and get the full context: In other words, do a mini search, few minutes of googling the news or searching for the full clip will let you get the full context or information. I can speak for 40 minutes about why men are providers for example, and one person will edit out a few seconds of my saying "women are meant to be taken care of by men," they could post captions heavily pushing that agenda and leave out where I say something like "but women should also learn to be resourceful and help support." 4. Check if other platforms have the same news: By this, I mean read-through to see the narrative reported. Students not allowed to write exams because of school fees payment is a normal occurrence we all know, as it is a business that needs money to pay its staff. But when it's reported highlighting the owner of the institution, it turns from just reporting the news to expecting a certain reaction targeted at the owner of the school. 5. Check the date: When people push propaganda, they can from time to time take old clips, and images presenting them as current to push a narrative. 6. Check your bias: Sometimes we easily swallow something because it agrees with our world view, thesame way we fight what goes against those views, no matter how glaring the evidence before us. Try to make sure that you take in information with an open mind, and most importantly, remember because you see it on the internet, does not automatically make it true.

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Anita Koske

Würzburg • 10 months, 3 weeks ago

Wow, I'm amazed and this piece got me googling to do some fact checking, and ended up in the DM. This is great storytelling!

Hi, it's Samuel, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a Creative Writer and Poet on a mission to Tell Stories That Torch! You can find some of my works below https://www.instagram.com/p...

Oluseyi Vandy

Freelance writer, audio producer, 3D modelling

Lagos, Nigeria

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Freelance scriptwriter and creative photographer

Lagos, Nigeria

Scrolling through my Instagram feed on Saturday, I came across the news of Nigerian public figure, and comedian; Mr Jollof declaring his support for APC presidential flag bearer, Bola Tinubu. But rather than the news itself, what was most interesting about that post, were the comments. It's no secret that the Nigerian youths see APC and PDP, as synonymous to backwardness and 'evil'. So it came as no surprise to see the negative comments aimed at Mr.Jollof. The youths were angry and boy did they let him know. How dare he support Tinubu, rather than the man of the people; Peter Obi. He was accused of being part of our nation's problems, an enemy of Nigeria's development amongst other names. The question here however, is; did he really do anything wrong in declaring his support for the APC man? Going by the true meaning of democracy, Mr. Jollof is well within his rights to support whomever he chooses to. And as such, shouldn't be subjected to insults and accusations of being an unpatriotic Nigerian. I understand the frustrations of Nigerians concerning PDP, and APC - both parties have failed us in all honesty. But bullying and abusing anyone who decides to vote for any of their flag bearers is wrong, and certainly not the way to go about campaigning for Peter Obi. The truth remains, in times like this, people most likely pitch their tents wherever it would favor them. Reasons for supporting a political candidate, range from collective development, to personal gain. We should understand that not everyone is after collective development. That's one of the 'uglies' in politics. I believe there is a better way to go about ensuring the right man gets the job. Rather than insults, we should aim to win others over to our side convincingly. Insults would only make those on the other side more defiant. During the election period, it is guaranteed to meet others with varying opinions, and preferred candidates. Are we going to keep abusing and bullying them? We can do better, we have to do better.

In Politics • 2 min read • Jun 13, 2022 14:54p.m.

To each his own

To each his own

Jefferson Nnadiekwe

0:00 / 0:00

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The world around us is a reflection of the human mind. This is something that I’ve come to internalize and come to believe deeply. You cannot separate an environment from the minds that make up the environment. So what are the implications of this truth? It means that an environment that is beautiful, developed, organized is a result of minds that are equally beautiful, developed and organized. An environment that is chaotic, disorganized, undeveloped is a product of minds that are equally chaotic, disorganized and undeveloped. This might sound harsh, but it is the reality. What it also means is that if you want to build a society that is progressive, you have to focus first on developing minds that are progressive. Everything that brings progress springs forth from a developed mind. The average Nigeria believes ‘if we solve power, we’ve solved 90% of our problems’ or ‘we need to invest in infrastructure to develop’. This misses the whole essence of development. If you want Nigeria to develop, invest in the minds of Nigerians first, and the roads, rails, power and everything else will come. We’ve invested in roads without the engineers to maintain them, rail that crumbled in the absence of rail engineers, bridges and buildings collapsing because of poor workmanship. Investing in infrastructure without investing in the people who will build, maintain and improve the infra shows a fundamental lack of understanding of how true development works. Build the mind of the people. And the people will build the country

293

Comments

Queensley Okon

Ota • 2 years, 5 months ago

This makes a lot of sense

Hi, it's Jefferson, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a creative screenwriter, photographer, cinematographer and creative director. You can check out some of my works here https://instagram.com/themi...

Tomi Walker

Product

Lagos, Nigeria

369

1529

In Nigeria • 1 min read • Jan 14, 2023 16:11p.m.

The World Is A Reflection Of The Mind

The World Is A Reflection Of The Mind

Tomi Walker

0:00 / 0:00

Yes, it is a real thing and even though it was something I made up that is yet to make it into any dictionary, not even urban dictionary, I still stand confident that it is a real thing that we must talk about. Work esteem is a concept I developed through my years breaking into the labor market and trying to just survive. As a new graduate with no idea about my skills, what I could offer to the market, and my relevancy in this world, I already had a bad start to the beginning of what eventually became an overwhelming rollercoaster in the labor force…and I know that I am only one who felt that way. Imagine this: You have spent four or five years gaining theoretical knowledge about a course or field that you somehow found yourself in. You managed to scale through by crook and nook and sacrificing your mental health but all that is finally over, you have graduated. You start celebrating, high on life, filled with hopes for the new future you are about to experience. For some of you, you are lucky enough to already know what you want to do when you leave, for others you have legs long enough to take you anywhere, and for others, you are trying to eat your rice in peace because the thought of the future is an instant panic attack. Clearly, I was ‘others’ but let’s not digress. Halfway into the rice, the realization that you have gone from undergraduate to unemployed starts to painfully sink in and whether or not you are ready for it, you still worry a bit and you wonder how it is going to be. Fast forward to a few months later, some of you are settled nicely in your cushion offices, holding on to the coattails of whoever squeezed you in with their power. Some others are still running around trying to figure out what they need to do, CV in one hand and application to Japa in the other. The final batch made it into a company, they don’t know what they are doing there other than the fact that they can finally brag that they are gainfully employed. Yay! You finally have a job, but whilst you are super excited that you can finally join the big boys and tell people you work now, you are also starting at the bottom of the ladder, doing something you’ve never done before, and as a result, your confidence and esteem takes a real hit. For some, it starts from the first day, you’ll already start hearing a tiny voice in your head telling you that you’re not good enough and that you’re probably going to get fired soon. Stick with me…don’t stop imagining. At this point, this is where ‘work esteem’ becomes a thing and basically it means the same thing as self-esteem except it is especially suited for the work environment. I didn’t agree with myself at first that this was a thing until I started having regular mental breakdowns on Monday to Friday and then when the weekend rolled in, I was absolutely fine. I was confident in myself, my appearance, and everything else but the moment someone mentioned anything about my work or capacity, it was back down to breaking down. I concluded then that having relatively high self-esteem in my life did not translate at all to my work. I entered the labor market very beggarly because I was unsure of what I had to offer and I was too scared to ask for more or reach for more...and I spent my first two years, working aimlessly just to get scraps of compliments from my bosses. This is the moment where some people start to experience imposter syndrome and then fear of failure for others. You panic every time the phone rings, you worry every time someone comments on your work, your heart skips a thousand beat once your manager calls and almost every night, you are wondering why they haven’t fired you yet. You work like a slave and take on more tasks than you are paid for because you worry that if they fire you you can’t somewhere else or that you have to do it to properly earn your pay. You magnify every comment about your work and emotionally dwell on past failures. For me, I nearly quit many times but then again I didn’t even have the confidence to quit so I guess in a way, my low work esteem protected me. Everywhere you turn, there are a million and one people who are so much better than you. You graduated with a first-class, worked at a big company for your internship, and acquired relevant Coursera certificates yet there is one guy who is younger than who, earning nearly three times as you, started three companies already, and is the consultant for the company you work for. At this point, you have been working for a while but it feels like there is no progress, your salary is becoming even more useless but you don’t know if you can ask for more because you don’t think you deserve it. You are already hating your job, everybody on LinkedIn is working their dream jobs and earning millions of dollars at 18 and there’s you, you who is just trying to not quit and wondering why you studied 5 years in university only to suffer like this. You are considering starting a business but when you can barely send an email without typos, how would you start a business? Your ‘work esteem’ here has basically hit rock bottom. Let me tell you something, if you are experiencing this and you are wondering why this is happening to you…and why everyone else seems to be fine...I’ll let you know one thing. You are not alone. I can’t say for all people but I can boldly say this happens to a lot of people and it is okay. So here’s what you can do to overcome it. First, step out and see the light. No, sorry, that’s the wrong advice, definitely not for this post. The first thing I did to overcome this was to sit back and draw a list of the value I bring to work. What can I do? What do I do? Where am I relevant? You’ll be surprised to see how much you have been underselling yourself. If you can’t answer these questions yourself, find someone who will tell you. It could be a work colleague or a good friend, just find someone who you trust and let them sit with you through this conversation. Once you figure out what you can do, then you need to go around and search for the market value of your skills. How much are my skills worth in the market? If you realize you are worth more, then you need to decide to either stick with where you are and demand a pay raise or go somewhere you will be better appreciated. Some companies are great enough to evaluate and increase your salary without prompt but most will not…because who doesn’t like cheap labor…so you have to do it. I died a hundred times when I sent an email about an increase in my salary and even then I approached it so beggarly but surprisingly, the feedback was so positive, I wondered why I was suffering for so long. Once I started earning better, my work esteem was greatly boosted. The next thing I did was to begin to take louder initiatives so rather than labor in silence and earn nothing, I worked louder. Basically, be more proactive, and be seen. Within a few months of doing this, I got promoted twice...and up my work esteem went. Yes, you are a fresh graduate and you don’t have a lot of experience, yes, everyone else seems to know better than you and you don’t have much to offer…but it doesn’t matter. Sell yourself bigger than you truly are and then work to meet that standard…that’s the principle I now work with…and it works amazingly well. Finally, challenge yourself out of your comfort zone. Accomplishing things you were afraid to do will not only boost your work esteem but position you for better opportunities. Identify your strengths and capitalize on them; rather than dwell in misery about your weakness, make noise about your strength and make it so relevant that they can’t do without you. Let me give an example, in one of the places I worked, I created a niche department that added significant value to the company but my work esteem was too low to appreciate it. I still worked beggarly and settled for scraps. It wasn’t until I got sick one day and requested a three-day leave that the reply email read ‘due to the importance of your position, we can only offer you one day's leave’...It was at this moment, I realized how much I had undervalued my efforts for the company. I decided to add more strength to the niche department, capitalize on it and make so much noise about it until I was promoted to the head of the department. If you look back at how far you have come, you’ll be surprised at how much you have done and how much better you are than you think. So this is my little message to new graduates and fresh workers, don’t sell yourself short. Ask for more than you think you deserve at interviews, be shameless about your worth…and don’t let loyalty to any organization drag your work esteem to the trenches. Peace Until next time!

276

Hi, it's Tomi, thanks for reading my insights.

A believer. A builder. I help product organizations find zen in the chaos. I believe in the power of the few to transform the world http://www.tomiwalker.com/

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In Career and Jobs • 4 min read • Feb 09, 2023 09:25a.m.

This thing called ‘work esteem’

This thing called ‘work esteem’

Esther Omemu

0:00 / 0:00

Oluseyi Vandy

Samuel Ibok Samuel Bika

But first, let's answer the question : can we or can we not blow our nose into the dinner napkin? The answer is NO! Dinner napkin is used for gentle blotting or patting, not wiping your lips during a meal. Rather go the restroom if you have to blow your nose. A couple of years ago, I attended a formal dinner in one of the high-end restaurants in Yaoundé, Cameroon. I was sitting next to this affluent and successful person ( I don't want to give away gender details for privacy purposes),who seemed to know how to behave at the fine dinning setting as they fine dine on daily basis. Table manners of this person appeared to be quite questionable, but I tried not to distract myself by them. I didn't know in the next couple of minutes I was going to get the worst dinner experience ever! Right after the main course, this affluent person I sat next to, decided to remove the napkin from the lap, vigorously wiped the face, loudly blew the nose right in front of the faces of the rest of the guests and then displayed the napkin on the table! It's bad enough but unfortunately, it 's not the end of this horror story.... The cherry on top was the moment when we were served dessert and while I was enjoying my chocolate mousse, the napkin lying just next to me UNFOLDED!!! Yes, I was eating my chocolate mousse with sneezers looking at me! It was that moment I realized that it doesn't matter how affluent, matured, experienced or wealthy you are - manners and common sense is something we need to learn and practice every single day. what would you do in this situation? let me know in the comments!

524

Comments

David Adaaja

1 year, 9 months ago

This was literally me a couple of years ago. Even made a huge mistake at work. But I've found my feet and confidence.

Hi, it's Esther, thanks for reading my insights.

A creative writer born, bred and established in art of advertising...Feel free to check out my work samples here https://copyfol.io/v/mnw7r7...

Mwambo Kate

COO @ Enchird Technologies Sarl.

Yaoundé, Cameroon

In People and Society • 2 min read • Jun 08, 2022 13:36p.m.

Napkin etiquette & Horror story

Napkin etiquette & Horror story

Mwambo Kate

0:00 / 0:00

332

Comments

Hero James

Lagos • 2 years, 5 months ago

I wouldn't promise I'll maintain my cool but my choice of words would have been soft though considering the environment.

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Mwambo Kate

Yaoundé • 1 year, 11 months ago

1.Probably the fear of starting all over.

Hi, it's Samuel, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a Creative Writer and Poet on a mission to Tell Stories That Torch! You can find some of my works below https://www.instagram.com/p...

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Alfred Lagos

2 years, 5 months ago

On Point👌

Jefferson Nnadiekwe

Freelance scriptwriter and creative photographer

Lagos, Nigeria

Noblesse oblige. Such a fancy term I hadn't heard of till a few nights ago. I was scrolling through status updates on Whatsapp and came across the term on a contact's status. She had just learned the word and typical with every new thing we learn she too passed it on to me albeit unknowingly. It gets more interesting than it already is when you discover the meaning. According to Webster's dictionary, Noblesse oblige refers to the idea that people who have high social rank or wealth should be helpful and generous to people of lower rank, or people who are poor. It's funny that this is a general belief shared by quite a number of people in society, we just didn't know it had a name for it. Now that we know, let's talk about this ideology.  We can coin the word 'noble' already from it, which means that it is a noble thought. However, does the fact that something appears noble automatically make it valid? Is it really the duty of the wealthy amongst us to help the poor? I mean, we all had our own share of opportunities to become successful didn't we? So why should those who utilized theirs be responsible for the others who did not. Most men who are asked their motivation to attain wealth, will tell you first and foremost that it is to be able to give themselves and their families an avenue to a better life. Then a few would add helping others as subsequent reasons. It is after all human nature to think first about our needs as we are inherently selfish (which isn't necessarily a bad thing). Having agreed that it is normal to be selfish as humans, let us also bear in mind that in as much as selflessness exists , so do kindness and empathy. Beyond the gratification of the soul, these virtues exists as a form of societal balance. Yes, we all have our opportunities at greatness, and yes, some people make use of said opportunities and work harder than others. However, there are some other factors other than hard work that determines the success of a person. There is chance, time, and may I say; luck.  Honestly, everyone can't be rich - it's chaotic. Can you imagine a world where everyone has the means to get whatever they want? On first thought, it sounds like an utopian world, but careful examination will make it clear that it would be a world driven by unhealthy and toxic competition. This is simply because the wants will certainly outweigh the available resources leading to disruption in the natural order. Therefore, in order to avert that, the universe in its wisdom has set two sides - rich and poor. Even the holy book states that the poor will always be among us. By nature, it is the duty of the wealthy/upper class to help the poor/lower class. I say it's by nature because the disparity will always exist - It is not entitlement like a lot of people like to think. Earlier I stated that Noblesse oblige helps maintain societal balance, let me explain. Class difference is already an uncomfortable reality, then think about what neglect adds to it. I will give you a hint, a combustible situation. Uprisings and revolutions sometimes are triggered when the less privilege of a given society feel abandoned and neglected to a point it becomes unbearable. If all people of higher rank are concerned about, is gathering wealth for themselves without empathy for their counterparts on the opposite spectrum, it is only a matter of time before chaos ensues. I once heard someone say that every human being on earth is fighting to come out of a tunnel, and that the first thing that you do when you eventually come out, is to look back and help the next person out. God blesses men so they can in turn be a source of blessing to other men. Life is fickle, all the wealth we accumulate will not accompany us to the grave when it's our time to go. Isn't it better if it's used to impact several lives while we are on earth? Perhaps our government officials and elites should be introduced to the term 'Noblesse oblige'. Who knows, it may just be what is needed for a health and conducive society.  Then there are those who have used Noblesse oblige as a tool in their manipulation kit. But we shall talk about these guys some other time.

In People and Society • 4 min read • Apr 24, 2024 11:51a.m.

Noblesse Oblige

Noblesse Oblige

Jefferson Nnadiekwe

0:00 / 0:00

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Hi, it's Jefferson, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a creative screenwriter, photographer, cinematographer and creative director. You can check out some of my works here https://instagram.com/themi...

Samuel Ibok

Marketing Supervisor @ Crusader Sterling Pensions Limited

Lagos, Nigeria

I'm a fitness enthusiast, but I tend to walk away from conversations where "calories" are overemphasized. I get the idea behind calories and the need to enlighten people, but can we tone down on the technicalities? People just want to feel good after a workout rather than get hooked on the mathematics of calorie counting. Following the COVID-19 pandemic, millions of people finally chose health. Even my parents started exercising! It dawned on people that life truly is transient. Here's the crazy part: there are too many people out there with the title of fitness coach who just mislead people. I know a lady who shared that her so-called coach was basically body-shaming her. According to her, she lost confidence, and she felt like there was no need to continue exercising. I told her fitness is a journey, and we must understand that regular people cannot reach the heights reached by professional athletes. Don't let edited pictures fool you. It's all about the right angles and having a good camera!  I think we should define our fitness goals intentionally and carefully so as not to give ourselves room for self-harm in the event that we don't meet the target. There was a time I could jog daily for 3 months straight, but I can't even think of that now because I am already stuck in traffic by 5:30 a.m. and I get home drained. You won't die if you don't have a six-pack, and you will still live happily ever after with your bae even if you don't have a slim waistline or figure 8. Hey ladies, y'all are 10/10!  The fitness industry is a billion-dollar industry, and they're great at creating narratives. Your coach is hustling oo. Don't go and kill yourself. I am the last person to stick to a specific meal plan. It doesn't mean I am not disciplined; it only reflects the perception I have about fitness. Besides, following a meal plan is only part of the fitness equation. There's still the part about resting properly and genetics. Some people have a natural advantage, and that's just a fact. Please know this and have peace. For me, do what you can, even if it's only at home. You can get fit at home. I'm not against going to the fitness centre. But at this point, I would rather use the subscription money for food! I'm not even joking. Freedom sometimes stems from information. Do what is within your means, and seek knowledge about fitness. Don't injure yourself in a bid to attain a physique you can't afford to maintain. In other words, no go do pass yourself. Abi you want to win Mr Olympia? To all the calorie warriors out there, remember that you only have one body for a lifetime. Be careful how you mould it. Try to live a healthy and balanced life. Finally, be wise! My biological brother, @theprowellnesscoach on Instagram, is a nutritionist and wellness coach. I'm sure he'll smile when he reads this. #YourBodyYourChoice #FitFam

In Fitness and Body Building • 3 min read • Mar 09, 2024 18:12p.m.

"CALORIE WARRIORS"

"CALORIE WARRIORS"

Samuel Ibok

0:00 / 0:00

Cyrus Majebi

Queensley Okon

Anita Koske

wellness fitness gyming calories

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On the 8th of September, 2022, the British monarchy lost its head monarch, Queen Elizabeth II. Within minutes of her passing, the whole world knew she was dead and tributes began pouring in from all over. Although, different people had quite distinct reactions to the development. Many were mournful, others liked the Irish expressed joy and a few others like me were indifferent. While the Queen was on her deathbed, one Uju Anya, a Nigerian-born American professor made a controversial tweet. She tweeted, "I heard the chief monarch of a thieving raping genocidal empire is finally dying. May her pain be excruciating." While it might be morally wrong to disparage a person who is dying, or actually dead, we shouldn't forget that everyone has the right to free speech. This is one of the charters of the UN convention. Logically, no crime has been committed but from the standpoint of humanity and morality, it is all shades of wrong. In her defense, one could easily say she made the tweet in reference to the British empire's colonisation efforts in places like Africa and India; the death and bloodshed that followed, and the direct result of the "Potato famine of 1845". Although, the Queen Elizabeth wasn't even born when most of these things happened or started but she met them when she ascended the throne. She never for once acknowledged that whatever her progenitors did was wrong and apologised for it. She carried on as if all is well. In the area of colonisation, she continued with the family legacy. It could easily be assumed, that she supported the actions of her ancestors and in this light Uju Anya's take on Britain being a thieving, raping, genocidal empire is valid. Uju Anya's tweet went viral and the rest of the world made sure to gaslight her for her unsavory remarks on the "dear Queen." Jeff Bezos, the second richest man in the world, among many other prominent and famous people, called her out in no unclear terms. Infact, one could say she was almost lynched with words. Nigerians who are known to be supportive of their countrymen came to the rescue. Now, this is where I have a problem. Uju Anya, being Igbo, mainly Nigerians of Igbo extraction came to her defense. Not that anything is wrong with this but if you want to defend something, do it intelligently and not based on sentiments and uninformed hot takes. I read things that made me question my knowledge of political history. Many of these people hurled vitriol at the late Queen, using the Nigerian civil war as their excuse, juxtaposing two parallel arguments. Their argument was that Britain under the Queen refused to sell arms to Biafra, supporting the Nigerian government against Biafra and that Britain was somehow responsible for the lives lost from the war. While I disagree with this argument, it is a fact that for any event, there are causes and effects. A lot of Igbos have refused to acknowledge the causes of the war but are quick to remember the effects, solely because they bore the brunt. The Nigerian Civil war was ignited by a series of unfortunate events that began from the January 1966 coup led by Kaduna Nzeogwu and Emmanuel Ifeajuna which culminated in the murder of 22 people, mainly from the North and Mid Western regions by people of mainly Eastern region origin. It was agreed by the coupists to kill the regional leaders of all the regions but at the end of the coup, the leaders of the Eastern region were all alive and well while those of the Northern and Mid Western regions had been killed. This is why the January 1966 coup was nicknamed an "Igbo coup." After the coup, another Igbo man in the person of Aguiyi Ironsi became the Head of state. He promised to try the coupists and serve justice. This calmed the nerves of the North but at the end of the day, it was discovered that the coupists were only arrested but never tried. Infact, they were being paid their full salaries while in detention and were even billed for promotion. All this led to a counter coup by Northern military officers on July 29, 1966 and the unfortunate pogrom of 1966-1967 and the Civil war of 1967-1970. If we go back to a few years after independence, it was Nnamdi Azikiwe, the great Zik of Africa that decided against the inclusion of a secession clause to the constitution. Today, his posterity is suffering from it. All of this shows us, as a people, we are not aware of our history and because we are not aware of our own history, we have distorted it, such that propaganda and pseudo history has been orally passed down from one generation to another. This is why many people believe they were just sitting down on their own, minding their business and "Hausa" people came and attacked them. There was no provocation or trigger that preceded the Nigerian Civil War. Hausa people just woke up one morning and decided to descend on the people of Eastern Nigeria because their breaths stunk and they didn't like their faces. But this is definitely not what happened. However, since we have refused to write our own history, and worse still, we have refused to teach it in schools, there are millions of people who believe in this version of events. The really unfortunate thing is that this misinformation and misrepresentation of facts will continue. In light of all of this, I believe it is obvious that the Queen, albeit being the biggest beneficiary of the atrocities of her progenitors, is not responsible and had hand no hand in the cause of the Nigerian Civil War. If we're looking for who to blame, we shouldn't look too far. We should look at ourselves. If any Nigerian wants to blight the Queen, it should be on the basis of the fact that the British monarchy as an institution, of which the Queen is the single largest beneficiary plundered, pillaged and raped a large part of Africa for its personal benefit.

253

Hi, it's Samuel, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a Creative Writer and Poet on a mission to Tell Stories That Torch! You can find some of my works below https://www.instagram.com/p...

Tari Ogbowei

Content Writer and contributor @ TwoCents

Yenagoa, Nigeria

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16826

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In Politics • 4 min read • Sep 18, 2022 22:11p.m.

THE QUEEN IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE CIVIL WAR

THE QUEEN IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE CIVIL WAR

Tari Ogbowei

0:00 / 0:00

After you grew, you let yourself slip Back to the place where shadows whispered your name, Where the hurtful gaze seared through your soul. Some say you were blinded by love, That was why you endured the verbal slaps, The virtual kicks that bruised more than skin. You never gave as good as you got Perhaps because you never received as good as you gave. In moments like this, when I sit and remember you, Wet anger boils out of me. I want to reprimand you, Shake you free from those chains, But it’s too late to teach you new tricks, Too late to mend what’s already broken. Out of the blues, you grew, in magnificence, as much as in horror, You grew horns as sharp as your newfound resolve, Dished out rewards on those who wronged you. And though I’m proud of the vileness of your crime, A bitter pride it is,For what have we become? At least they deserved every blow you dealt, And if I threw in a punch or two, Nothing feels amiss, nothing feels wrong. It was a time to let live and a time to live, But at what cost to my soul? I remember when fondness was your only language, It was in the words you gave me and, the way you hugged me wholly. Not even the street peddlers or beggars can deny the tune your heart sings with. But now, the tune has changed, The discord now echoes with noisy pain. The stern hand still resounds, The hard smile before the harder kick These days, even your eyes speak of resistance, Though your heart remains true, A thin layer of ice has formed where once was fire. I got so used to your old voice, But the one you use now is Greek, Zulu, and Venda to my ears. That hard stare buckles my knees, Your fangs dig deep when I reach out, I am no stranger to them, but, they only used to care in my memories. I could have forgiven the hurt if you were grey and frail, But there’s nothing aged about "65".When I sat at your knee, listening to your lonely old tales, You should have told me to hold them in place, To keep them safe for a day like this I would have planned for this rainy day. Now, you’re a blank slate, akin to a child, And time was never our ally, We don’t have all day to fill you with beautiful memories. And I’m left here, grasping at the shadows of yesterdays realities, Hoping that somewhere, beneath the ice, The warmth of your old heart still lingers.

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Comments

Hero James

Lagos • 2 years, 2 months ago

You don't tell a victim of war how to air her grievances. Her choice of words is proportional to her pains. Secondly, the coup was never...

edited

Chidera Odom

Restaurant Operations Manager @ Sundry Foods Ltd

Benin City, Nigeria

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In Literature, Writing and Blogging • 3 min read • Aug 25, 2024 21:25p.m.

LAYERS OF MEMORY AND ICE

LAYERS OF MEMORY AND ICE

Chidera Odom

0:00 / 0:00

Samuel Ibok Annie West Toni

ice forgive heal change

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Godwin Erite

Lagos • 2 months, 4 weeks ago

I love this piece. Thank you for sharing

Queensley Okon

Information Officer @ Covenant University

Ota, Nigeria

Over the weekend, there was uproar among the Americans when the popularly argued "Roe vs Wade" case was overruled by the Supreme Court. Yes overruled or overturned can be used interchangeably Nancy Pelosi called it a "dark day" in the US (because school children getting shot wasn't important or dark enough *laughs in irritation") You may be wondering, why all the fuss about abortion? Well, the Roe vs Wade ruling gave women the constitutional right to make decisions about abortions Overruling it means that there does not exist that right to make decisions about abortion and that right is criminalized. This was a ruling backed by a Mississippi law that bans women from aborting children 15 weeks after pregnancy Trust me, it's an interesting read and you should hug Google for it What then is abortion? "It is the termination of a pregnancy by expulsion of a fetus or embryo(growing baby)" Simply put, killing your unborn child(na English after everything) Why then are people mad about the decision? First of all, it puts those who are raped or going through something harmful and are in need of one, at risk. It also takes away the solution of terminating a baby you don't want. All these are well defined rights and the consequences are solely on the parents, most especially the women. Why then do people sit down and make legislations against something that won't really affect them? Why would your religion be a deciding factor in the lives of others? Is there an agreement between the both of you? Even if they have the same religious underpinnings, why would you force them to act like you? Have you met humans? We are dynamic in every sense of the word. Restrict us and watch us birth a rebellious monster Sometimes, people conflate religion ideals and how people would actually apply them As a Christian, I really haven't read where we are told not to abort explicitly (you can enlighten me if you find it) Maybe the Muslims have their own laws but it still is not enough Every human makes a decision everyday regarding how they apply things they learn Force has always been the enemy Religious ideals are not law, no matter how much you try to make them If a woman must have 20 abortions, that's on her, she knows the consequences and has made the decision to live with them I know you care but please, this is an adult, the consequences are waiting in the future I just hope you as a woman making that decision would be kind enough to disclose that to your intending partner, so they are fully aware and can take steps where necessary Because it really is counterproductive if you are secretive with it and think you can eat your lunch and still have it(very impossible) If you are proud of your decision, take it to the bank If you know you would have to hide it, then think well on it before you take the decision Better yet, abstain if you are scared of getting pregnant or use protection if you cannot control yourself Whatever the case, it really is none of my business or any other person's to make laws criminalizing that right What is your take on the idea of abortion?

In Women • 3 min read • Jun 27, 2022 11:15a.m.

LET'S TALK ABORTIONS

LET'S TALK ABORTIONS

Queensley Okon

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Reflecting on this remarkable nation can provoke various emotions from anyone, such as love, frustration, anger, and the need to take action. I've come to realize something significant. The responsibility of leadership or the path of a savior is never an easy one. I use the term "responsibility" because that's exactly what it is. While others lead carefree lives, you constantly remain aware of not just yourself, but also of your surroundings. You are conscious of how you and those around you are impacted by harsh conditions. Moreover, you hold yourself to a higher standard because, unlike others, you can't help but feel the need to address these issues. This can be as simple as acknowledging that something is wrong. Throughout history, there have been numerous great men and women who have been called saviors, standing up and standing out when their people needed them. They brought their people together, instilling belief and trust. We often hear the inspiring stories that propelled these individuals into the spotlight, like Moses, but there is a darker side to their journeys. Moses, for instance, never made it to the promised land. Many Nigerians have mentioned that "Nigeria(ns) are not worth fighting for." However, I'm sure you can think of a list of individuals who have not only risked their own lives and health, but also those of their friends and family. They did so not for personal gain, but because they could not bear the suffering any longer. They wanted those around them to believe that life held more than mere survival. Sadly, the reward they receive is often unjust. The very people they fought for may turn against them and tarnish their efforts, or when these helpers face adversity or are attacked, instead of receiving support from the people they fought for, they are met with silence. In some instances, after these individuals are no longer around, their people return to the old ways they had fought to change. Alternatively, if they are forcibly removed, they might become topics of discussion online for a mere 2-3 days. Their entire effort is reduced to a hashtag that fails to honor their legacy or their cause, with messages such as "may Nigeria not happen to you and your family," before swiftly moving on to the latest in a string of distracting and senseless topics. If you ever wonder why, I can relate, and though I do not claim to have a definitive answer, I do believe that we do not value life, nor do we value ourselves. I do not mean this in monetary terms, as we already place excessive emphasis on that aspect, to the point of overvaluation (if we are being honest). Rather, I refer to dignity and pride, recognizing that no individual should have to beg for food or be brought low for others to feel important or needed. Every person is precious, and if they act foolishly or make mistakes, they should be corrected, yet still embraced and shown love when they repent or learn from their errors. The reality of fighting for people's development has caused genuine concerned individuals to step back, while opportunists and "cashtivists," individuals who pretend to fight for the people but are actually motivated by personal gain, have rushed in. These opportunists are swift to switch sides when presented with the opportunity to join the very people they claim to be fighting against. They always have a price and are willing to sacrifice others to attain it. So, have you lost your fire to not only do what is right but to speak up, or have you been numbed by society?

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Comments

Mwambo Kate

Yaoundé • 2 years, 5 months ago

As much as I understand that to every rule there's an exception, I still think this law is not that bad.

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Oluseyi Vandy

Freelance writer, audio producer, 3D modelling

Lagos, Nigeria

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In People and Society • 3 min read • Jun 06, 2024 14:04p.m.

The Moses Phenomenon

The Moses Phenomenon

Oluseyi Vandy

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Samuel Ibok

Marketing Supervisor @ Crusader Sterling Pensions Limited

Lagos, Nigeria

Dear woke people, Wake up! This post represents my thoughts, and this post is not for everyone. Let me start by saying that it is becoming increasingly difficult to live as a normal person in this mad world. Yes, the woke march hasn't been fully embraced in Africa, but those of us who see it can identify little patches. Woke.com is gradually gaining more followers, and if you haven't subscribed, they'll come for you. There is nothing crazier than the idea of relativism in the context of gender, sexuality, and culture; you can add the rest yourself. If everything is relative, then perhaps we have all been fooled since birth. The uninformed and the informed are the most dangerous! Those who, with words, make others build towers leading to the heavens My advice is to stay dogged, irrespective of eloquence. Sometimes you must protect your ignorance, as it may be your innocence. Besides, unapologetic doesn't mean intelligent! Don't accommodate ideals you don't understand or aren't comfortable with. We've told people their words count, irrespective of how uninformed their opinions are. It's basically the "fence mentality" we're pushing. I wonder how our people fare in climes where wokeness is democracy. Well, who am I to judge? I could be wrong, but is wrong not right depending on the beholder? I mean, right and wrong are on a spectrum. I hope you got the joke! I feel free speech gives room to wrong speech. These days, we can't correct people without being called names. This is my TwoCents to woke people. Learn Unlearn Relearn

In People and Society • 2 min read • Nov 09, 2022 11:27a.m.

Dear woke people, Wake up!

Dear woke people, Wake up!

Samuel Ibok

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Queensley Okon

Information Officer @ Covenant University

Ota, Nigeria

Recently, I have talked about Burna Boy's altercation and how that is tantamount to entitlement But let us examine entitlement in a broader perspective What is Entitlement? The Oxford dictionary defines it in three ways 1. the fact of having a right to something. So we could give an example like: * I paid my rent so I am entitled to have light and water flowing in this house 2. the amount to which a person has a right. It further went on to list grants, allocation and inheritance as entitlements. 3. the belief that one is inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment. These are very clear and succinct definitions of the word What scenarios can be seen as entitlement? This is my take RAPE This alludes to the third definition of a belief that one is inherently deserving of rights or special treatment. Simply put, rape is forced sex or sex against one's will. This means there is always an unwilling party and the "willing" party decided they had to have this person or nothing else matters. It exhibits itself as a high form of entitlement, because what gives you the right to think you can have carnal knowledge of someone without the person's consent. Why do you feel that body is owed to you? Is there a sign or document bestowing that right on you? PARENTAL CARE A lot of people want to get married and have children and that is beautiful. But do not forget that having children means preparing yourself to have a multitude of responsibilities. Some people just have children and complain everyday. What were you thinking was going to happen? The children would come and everything would be perfect? It is your job and your responsibility to take care of that child till they can stand in their own. You are the first teacher, girlfriend, boyfriend, mentor, protector, etc that they would have before they leave to experience the world on their own. They exhibit the things you have instilled in them. I used to love a particular saying that goes "a child tells in the street what its parents say at home" and if this isn't the truth, I don't know what is. EMOLUMENTS Salariés, rémunération, bonuses, recognition, whatever you want to call it, these are entitlements. When someone works for you, they are entitled to get paid. If you must owe them, that has to be clearly communicated so they have backup plans. They have fulfilled their part of the contract, it is your duty as an employer to ensure your staff are not working for free. HEALTH This is one thing a lot of us take for granted but do you realize as a citizen, you are entitled to good health? That should be something your taxes cover. You pay taxes because you want the services that come with it. You are saying to your leaders, I put you in charge of my life, here is my contribution to make that possible. If this does not happen, you are losing out on your rights ASSAULT I don't even know if this is the right heading for this but let us keep it going. Have you noticed that people do not know how to handle rejection? All their lives, they have been told they deserve everything and anything they want, they should go for it. When reality hits them, they respond negatively and what happens? They go to extremes to ensure they get what they want or no one gets it. This is why we have an abundance of serial killers, this is why people get killed on a daily. It is another reason why a guy or girl would crash a wedding because he or she doesn't understand the word "NO". It is why kidnaps happen and people get beaten up because they said "NO". There are probably more scenarios that express how harmful entitlement feels. Entitlement also occurs in a positive way so there is that. But in all, you should educate yourself on what you really deserve and drop the load of what you think you deserve. Having a better understanding of what you are entitled to and what should not be an entitlement may very well aid our society to achieve some form of sanity But hey, I may just be yapping and not making sense. Did this make sense to you? Let me know in the comments What other scenarios are examples of entitlement?

In People and Society • 3 min read • Jun 30, 2022 12:46p.m.

ENTITLEMENT

ENTITLEMENT

Queensley Okon

0:00 / 0:00

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Hi, it's Queensley, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a Virtual Assistant, Freelance Writer, and help with your academic research. Reach me here https://wa.me/2348167337301

Queensley Okon

Information Officer @ Covenant University

Ota, Nigeria

Not to worry, I'm writing in cursive(as SZA fans would say), you know, tapping into my Gen Z or whatever mode it fits But hey, who cares, we are here for a good time and not a long time right, so why bother writing out anything? I'm kidding, I do enjoy writing things out so let me put your mind at ease BHM is BLACK HISTORY MONTH!!!!!!!! Yay!!!!!! Are you as excited as the exclamations in my previous sentences? No? I guess not But yeah, February has always been reminiscent for Black Americans as a month to celebrate their ethnicity and values and culture and how far they have come from conquering slavery and I guess what the future holds. And this February has not been left out as it has been quite extraordinary due to the feats already achieved in the space of two weeks Wanna know more? Keep reading and you will First of all, this month began with Beyonce fans getting excited as she finally announced her world tour, after performing in Dubai for a grand opening of a hotel for a whooping sum of 24 million dollars. Yeah you heard that right, 24 million!!! Of course there were mixed reactions as some people thought that was just ridiculous for an hour's performance while others were proud or would I say so meshed in their emotions, they continued the worship of Beyonce and how she is not to be messed with, noting that as a black woman, this was historic. I mean the Arab money is not to be messed with, they got bank but for an hour's performance, I think not but go on girl, you have supposedly earned it Of course the alphabet community was not left out as they pointed out the hypocrisy in her performing for people who are against their "charming" lifestyle. Some even promised to withdraw support but I knew it was only comical because those tour waiting lines say different. Yes, a million people in line for the Renaissance tour is not as withdrawn as I would have pictured, so maybe their memory is as short as I don't know, a Kevin Hart or Kim Kardashian's 72-hour engagement 😎😎😎 That's up to them, I really do not care And still on Beyonce, last Sunday, she made history by being the most awarded artiste in Grammy history with 32 wins Now I'm not one to belittle achievements so I would say that is a beautiful one and congratulations are in order but I think at this point they just give her Grammies for giving sake or because she is Beyonce. That album was not Grammy worthy but hey, a win is a win, right? And you should note that despite this grand achievement, her entitled fans felt the need to hound the Grammies and Harry Styles because his album won over hers for "Album of the year". Now I have not listened to his album so I cannot really say if he did an amazing job on it but the guy had been carrying crowds all year 2022 and really doing his thing and his album was well received by a lot of people. The Renaissance album was not worth the hype in my opinion, in fact, it had to be forced on people and TikTok played a part in pushing two of the songs that gained popularity.. I remember when it came out, and the same people complaining called it trash or mid, so I find it odd that now they are angry it did not win Album of the year. It definitely was not Album of the year but entitlement wins I guess. Enough of Beyonce, let us go to other noteworthy acts Tems, a very talented singer became the first Nigerian female since Sade(check your history if you don't know her, she is a legend) to win a Grammy and damn, I am so proud of her. I remember when I saw her live in 2019 Palm Wine Fest, and she sang two of her jams then, Try Me and Mr Rebel. When I say this girl is talented, I would really be understating it. She sounded no different from the tracks. Beautiful voice and she brought something different to the table. In a few years, she has gone from that calm upcoming singer to a writer for Beyonce and Rihanna and a Grammy winner. Now that is cool 😎😎😎😎Speaking of Rihanna, she is about to headline the SuperBowl!!!!! She hasn't performed or recorded music in 6 years so this would be one to watch. The promo has been off the hook and I just really want to see what she brings.And please Rihanna haters, aka Beyhive, stay in your lane. I'm sure your fave announced her tour this year so she can take her shine. She always tends to come when RihRih doing something, like when Rih announced she was preggers and here comes Bey with some clothing line announcement, or when Rih was receiving her Video Vanguard and of course they scheduled Beyonce to also perform. It's like, okay we get it, quit with it already, we know you want the attention on you so bad but be calm 🙄🙄Oh, by the way, these thoughts are just what we see, thanks to stan Twitter and blog comments, they are not necessarily my thoughts. May be true, may not be true but it gets you wondering though. We cannot forget the men as Lebron James became the all time top scorer in the NBA. For those of you who love Basketball, you would agree that James is one of the greats and this is something beautiful to celebrate as he broke Kareem Abdul-Jabber's record. I know a lot of people don't like him or the way he lies but when someone puts in the work, you have to give credit where it is due and oga has paid it in full. I mean, do you know what it means to play about seven or eight fathers and sons? That's legendary and you gotta put some respeck on his name ( in my birdman voice)Let's not forget this was the 50th anniversary of the existence of the Hip Hop genre and let me just say, the generational flow of the genre evolution was great but missed out on the 2010s because tell me why you are bringing one hit wonders like Glorilla to the stage? Even Lil Baby's set was real quiet and that should tell you a lot. If you want to touch on the new generation, you should have focused on those who put in the work like Dababy, Roddy Rich, Flo Milli, or to help yourself, just ended with the 2010s honestly because the new generation hasn't put in enough work to be included. They could have been shown as highlights but not performers unless they were performing hits of older generations.The "God Did" performance was a waste of food in my opinion but at least they made up for something.And yes, to me Wayne had the best verse😎😎🌚🌚Jay Z fanboys can suck it.  And finally, Billboard and VIBE dropped its list of 50 Greatest rappers of all time and in the top ten, we had Jay Z as number 1, Kendrick 2nd, Nas 3rd, Tupac 4th, Eminem 5th, Biggie 6th, Wayne 7th, Drake 8th, Snoop Dogg 9th and Nicki Minaj 10th. Now this is a solid list or looks solid until you realize Kanye and Cole are missing in the top ten. I mean, even Jadakiss raps better than a lot of these dudes and I mean that in the best way possible. Snoop Dogg and Drake are way too high on this list(in my opinion) and Wayne is way too low. And if we are keeping it a buck, Nicki has already gone toe to toe with most men on this list so she is way too low for me. And Eminem is only put in that position because a white man cannot be seen as number one in the genre but that's okay. As a friend of mine said to me, whatever list of rapper rankings comes out, not everyone would agree with it and I concur. He also noted that everyone here has done exceptionally well with their influence and deserve to be there and I agree. One thing he said that stood out to me was rap fans always putting Biggie and Pac way too high on the rankings because they did not live long enough to fail as the others have done and because of that, they seem like martyrs and with martryship comes an inexplicable respect. People just want to keep them on that pedestal and if I'm being honest, I agree. But at the same time, for them to still be brought up despite being dead over ten years is something to be marveled at. Whatever the case, I respect what these people have brought to the genre and I maintain my stance on some. You don't have to agree🌚🌚 And yes Jay Z should not be number one and a lot of people agree with me(Jay fanboys would come for me but I don't care)🤣🤣🤣 Anyway, Happy Black History Month!!!!!

In History and Culture • 3 min read • Feb 11, 2023 06:27a.m.

BHM

BHM

Queensley Okon

0:00 / 0:00

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Queensley Okon

Information Officer @ Covenant University

Ota, Nigeria

I know people have opinions and sometimes these could be misconstrued but today let us see how many of you would fall into that trap. Two weeks ago, I came across a post on Instagram where a film producer blamed the unfavorable reception of his movie on straight people and when I tell you I was amazed but decided to check the comments for more clarity First of all, I have never heard of this movie before the post and I am sure a lot of you did not because I have not seen think pieces or critical acclaim And the comments were proof of that because a lot of people were surprised, wondering what he was talking about seeing as this was the first time they had heard about it And yes, the movie is about two gay guys or has that as its basic theme In fact, those part of the LGBTQ+ community were quick to point out how wrong he was and defending the straights which totally floored me Then there were those among the community who had seen it and gave negative reviews, stating that just because you drop a "gay" themed movie, it does not mean people who are gay would want to watch it. It needs to have substance instead of being a costume I thought to myself, "maybe the world is healing" because never in a million years would I have predicted this. Some expressed how they were tired of just being put out there for sympathy points instead of actually making something interesting Now, notice no straight person called for his head right? They defended themselves isn't it? No one said they would be boycotting because of what he said. There is no public outrage for the insensitive statement and never have I heard a "straight" movie producer or director say their movie failed because "gay" people did not watch it. They always focus on the marketing or say how they could have done better which is what this clairvoyant director should have known. But imagine the outrage if the reverse was the case? Media outlets would run the news to the ground until the person's head is on a spike The delusion of it all People should learn how to speak and what to actually speak on. I know accountability is lacking in this era but do well to learn it. It would do a whole lot of good to your mental health and demeanor all round. Another thing is people would not watch your movie because you have some tokenism in it. If there is no plot or something of value to look forward to, it would flop. Also, if you make a movie, ensure you have a good marketing team because a lot of terrible movies had a good reception because of great trailers and exquisite marketing. No dey dull yourself Now, this is no affront to the community but a call to see the hypocrisy and maybe reevaluate some things. KEEP THE SAME ENERGY!!!

In People and Society • 2 min read • Oct 14, 2022 17:40p.m.

DELULU

DELULU

Queensley Okon

0:00 / 0:00

I recently stumbled upon an intriguing article on Quora, titled "Does Cancer Have An Odor?" If you know Quora, you know it’s a site where folks from all walks of life, as well as all over the world share their personal experiences and ask questions about any and everything. I won’t lie, people ask the weirdest questions there sha. I’m sure if you try searching; you can find a “how to defraud people” or even “how to get away with murder” question there. Hehe! Loved the show, by the way! Anyway, beneath that particular heading, a user shared a poignant account. He recounted how, during a trip with his mother and her close friend, he rested on his mother's friend's lap feeling tired and immediately detected a pungent, sickly aroma so potent it left him feeling sick. According to this narrator, within a month of this encounter, his mom's friend received a devastating diagnosis and eventually succumbed to I think, liver cancer or so.This article stirred a memory of one of my mom’s friends, who tragically passed away from cancer many years ago. I was young, still in secondary school yet I recall visiting her with my mother and younger brother, and when I embraced her, I noticed a faint yet unmistakable odor. I don't recall the exact timeframe between that encounter and her diagnosis, but that visit was the last time I saw her in good health, as she was diagnosed with cancer months or even a year later; and eventually passed away. The next time my mother took me to visit her friend just before her passing, i noticed that strange scent again, and this time its intensity was greater. And that last visit was equally the last time I saw my mom’s friend alive. So when I happened upon that Quora discussion, I was inevitably reminded of my own experience, and I couldn't help but wonder at the possibility that this peculiar odor was, in fact, a harbinger of her illness, much like the numerous individuals who shared their own anecdotes in the Quora thread, suggesting a potential connection between unusual body odors and underlying health issues.It’s just the weirdest thing. Perceiving a strange odor on someone else, only to find out the person has a life-threatening illness that eventually kills them.It’s the way I’ve also heard dogs and cats can detect sickness in humans through smell, as well. Dogs, in particular, who we all know possess an incredibly keen sense of smell, which enables some to be trained to predict and respond to seizures in people with epilepsy and other conditions. I don’t even think the capabilities in human and animals overall sense of smell is fully understood. I think it’s still somewhat a mystery. I thankfully haven’t had anything similar happen since then, or experienced many personal losses, but we were all deeply fond of my mother’s friend. She was in her forties, unmarried and didn’t have kids, this much I recollect. I also recall her to be a really soft spoken, kind woman and as much as that article made me sad to think about her, I’m happy I thought about her at all.I sincerely hope her soul continues to rest in eternal peace, and that her family experiences more healing and comfort over her memory, as the years go by. I extend the prayer for that healing and comfort to anyone afflicted with this mystifying disease, as well as families who have lost loved ones to this perplexing ailment to which a permanent cure remains elusive. It is well, but the thought of ever smelling sickness on another human long before a diagnosis confirms said illness, is something I pray never to experience again.

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Hi, it's Queensley, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a Virtual Assistant, Freelance Writer, and help with your academic research. Reach me here https://wa.me/2348167337301

Belinda Chiazor

Writer and Filmmaker @ Middle Girl Productions

Lagos, Nigeria

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In Health • 3 min read • Sep 08, 2024 17:52p.m.

Detecting Illness Through Smell

Detecting Illness Through Smell

Belinda Chiazor

0:00 / 0:00

Emetekefe Akpovwovwo

smell illness

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My options were either "The Rise of The Machines" or "The machines are coming". Seeing as they are already here, the choice of title was an easy one. If you are a big movie buff, the title brings to mind the Terminator franchise, one of Arnold's many iconic lines, while being big and menacing. If you missed it? Well, you have a front-row seat to the possible beginning of how the concept of the film came to be, machines dominating every work of life, but with a twist. Take away the end of days a dystopian future, cool bikes, and weaponry. This is the part they leave out of the film, probably because it's the part nobody cares enough to want to know, except if it's a comedy or parody. So, if you have a smartphone you are no stranger to the term AI, short for Artificial Intelligence. It's something that has been in development for years actually, as early as 1951. Before this version we see that turns our pictures into cool paintings or cartonized form, composes melodies and music, or writes job applications and essays. We've been interacting with it every time we have to prove how human we are by selecting cars or boats on websites. You know, what follows after we reply "I am human". What artificial intelligence is in summary, is machines mimicking human intelligence. They can identify pictures, speech, shapes, complete sentences, etc. Respond and react to different forms of a query with the most appropriate answer based on gathered information, or programs. This leads to the main point of this post. For a while now, some creatives have complained about the use of AI, how it affects their jobs; why would people pay graphics designers when an AI can give you killer art for free? Well, this has led to some unforeseen legal issues. As I stated earlier, an AI learns off materials or data that already exists online, basically copying from works it's seen on the internet, and using it as a guide to responding to queries or requests. So, when you ask that AI to turn your picture into a cool animation, it goes and searches for different samples that can help it execute that task. It then combines or uses the best of them to give you a work an artist would take hours to create and then charge for. Here lies the issue, this thing called intellectual property. The protection that covers an artist, to make sure that his art is not being exploited without him getting the monetary compensation that he deserves because to be fair, the machine is using their work to generate the art it gives, which the company that owns the AI then profits from, one of which is the continual use of their AI. Three Artists Sarah Andersen, Kelly McKernan, and Karla Ortiz have come out in the class action lawsuit against stability AI, DeviantArt, and Midjourney. They allege that the text-to-image AI tools have infringed the rights of thousands of artists and other creatives "under the guise of AI". -INDIAai The lawsuit alleges direct copyright infringement, violation of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA), vicarious copyright infringement related to forgeries, violation of class members' right of publicity, breach of contract related to the DeviantArt Terms of Service, and various violations of California's unfair competition laws, "without compensation or consent from the artists". With the popularity of such AI, their fear is understandable; especially as it threatens their source of livelihood, while stealing their work or art style. Now, someone can argue, how can they be sure who it took from? Especially when it mixes different styles or when the art it produces is something new. As we know there are always loopholes in the law, especially in the hands of a very savvy lawyer. This is still an ongoing issue and may grow with more artists' continual cries. There may be more lawsuits in the future as Getty Images has also sued Stability AI, another popular AI company behind the AI art tool Stable Diffusion, over copyright infringement. One thing is sure, the machines and companies behind them are already facing stiff opposition, but not for the reasons Terminator faithful like myself would expect. As they navigate through these unprecedented issues which will determine the livelihood of creatives for the foreseeable future, I can't help but marvel at how much work, legal tape, laws, and thought goes into something that the rest of the world just knows that at a push of a button, they get something that amazes and feeds our vanity. One thing is sure that the James Cameron got wrong, before they rise to conquer man, they most definitely first come after his job.

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Hi, it's Belinda, thanks for reading my insights.

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Oluseyi Vandy

Freelance writer, audio producer, 3D modelling

Lagos, Nigeria

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In Law and Governance • 4 min read • Jan 25, 2023 07:05a.m.

Rise of the Machines

Rise of the Machines

Oluseyi Vandy

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Hi, it's Oluseyi, thanks for reading my insights.

Let me tell you a story https://instagram.com/reneg...

Samuel Ibok

Marketing Supervisor @ Crusader Sterling Pensions Limited

Lagos, Nigeria

If you visit the gym consistently, you'll find this group of people who people stare at because of the volume of weight they lift. Now, keep in mind that they didn't get there overnight. So yeah, resist the urge to step up your weight game before time. This is crucial to avoid injury. Besides, if you get hurt, the most you'd get is sorry. Like we say in Nigeria, "no go de do pass yourself!" A while back, I saw a clip of someone who nearly died because he somehow convinced himself to attempt to add 20 kg to his barbell weight. It's just ridiculous. Even if you've been training for a while, you could still get hurt. So, be guided. "You should add the weights progressively rather than abruptly." He was lucky someone was there to spot him. That leads to another crucial point. It's okay to have someone spot you. This is regardless of how long you've been training. It's not for competition but rather to ensure proper execution of the exercise. Your form could be wrong, thereby wasting your reps. So yeah, it's okay to have someone by your side. In other words, swallow your ego and be safety conscious. Learn Unlearn Relearn

In Fitness and Body Building • 1 min read • Dec 10, 2022 21:49p.m.

Be calming down!

Be calming down!

Samuel Ibok

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Hi, it's Samuel, thanks for reading my insights.

I'm a Creative Writer and Poet on a mission to Tell Stories That Torch! You can find some of my works below https://www.instagram.com/p...

Jefferson Nnadiekwe

Freelance scriptwriter and creative photographer

Lagos, Nigeria

How much do our memories hold us back? Weird question.. I know. Memories are a gift. Through them we get to re-live the good times. They allow us call back the lovely details of a nice family trip, that vacation with a special person, or pleasant childhood experiences. Memories can be soothing. They can be a form of anti depressant, or an escape from anxiety and worry. Memories, can also be a form of restriction. Regrets, embarrassment and pain, could be a part of our memory. And sometimes, in order to avoid them; we hold back from doing something we really want to do. We know that the memory of failure lives with us and often haunts us, and it is just a few of us who can really subdue it. This knowledge, often leads to fear. The fear of having that failure ingrained in our memories. A man or woman may hold back from making their deep feeling for someone else known, due to the fear of rejection. But it's actually not the rejection that they fear. What they are really scared of, contrary to what they think; is the memory from that rejection. They're scared that when they lay in bed at night, the memory would torment them. And in a bid to avoid this, they hold back from expressing what they truly feel. Living with unpleasant memories, can be difficult for a lot of people. Shaking off that lingering recollections of failure isn't as easy as motivational pages make it seem. We remember rejections, hopelessness and failure. But imagine you had the ability to permanently discard any memory you choose, with a snap of your fingers. What happens then, is that you become emboldened. You know that you do not have to live with the torment of things not working out. You apply for that position, you make your feelings known to that lady. And if they do not go as you wish, you simply discard that memory. But unfortunately, we cannot delete memories in such manner. We live with it. If we are not held back by the burden of memory, we'd truly be free to do whatever we want.

In Literature, Writing and Blogging • 2 min read • Dec 19, 2022 15:29p.m.

THE GIFT AND BURDEN OF MEMORY

THE GIFT AND BURDEN OF MEMORY

Jefferson Nnadiekwe

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